Flirting: Eye Contact & Smile

Want to know how to use flirting eye contact and smile? You might be surprised about what this article will reveal to you.

Because most guys think that eye contact and smiling are essential parts of the flirting language.

And that’s both right and wrong.

A lot of guys get the “smile” part wrong. They completely overdo it.

Because what many men do is that they put that smile on their face and keep it there for the whole time they talk with a girl.

Everything the girl says gets her a smile.

It’s a really good way to make a fool of yourself.

A smile is a powerful flirting signal, but there is a right and a wrong way to do it. Think of the horn of a car – it’s a very useful signal to warn pedestrians, cyclists or other drivers of a dangerous situation, but a guy that drives through town constantly honking is a douchebag.

If you’re one of those guys that overdo the smiling, then ask yourself these questions:

  • Why am I smiling so much?
  • Is it because I’m trying to “hide” behind that smile? (Hide what? Um… something, like, insecurities for example?)
  • What does it look like to the woman if she’s always seeing me with that smile?
  • Do I actually smile because I feel like smiling (genuinely happy and joyful)?

It’s a fact that women are a lot better at reading body language and interpreting gestures and facial expressions. Their brain is better hardwired for that kind of stuff.

When you’re flirting, and you overdo the smiling, she’ll notice the in-congruence and that will raise all kinds of doubts about the disconnect between what you’re showing her, the facade, and what’s going on inside.

And most likely, she’s gonna conclude that you’re just an insecure guy who doesn’t know how to be really charming.

When it comes to eye contact during flirting though, there’s hardly any overdoing it.

Most guys simply don’t do it enough. But eye contact is a very powerful biological mechanism to activate a deep, primal part of a woman’s brain and stirr up intense feelings.

Because back in the days when our lives were more primitive, before civilization began to find it’s way into human existence, being attacked by predators or other human beings was a real threat.

So when we encountered other people that we weren’t familiar with, we looked each other in the eyes – and the one that looked away first basically “submitted” and acknowledged dominance of the other person. (You can still see this in the animal kingdom – when there are rivalries between mammals, there are “staring fights”, and the animal that looks away first signals that it will respect the higher authority of the other animal).

Now, of course when you flirt with a girl, you don’t want to look threatening at her. You want to look at her flirtatious and calm, not angry. But by simply being the one that doesn’t break the eye contact, you will establish that you are the one who is in control of your emotions and the situation. And that is something that’s highly attractive to women.

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